Post Father's Day weekend musings

The kids have started this thing where if they see a camera (or an iPhone, as it were) they have to make silly faces. See?

We're visiting with Lester's Uncle Derrick at the Marriott Wardman Park Hotel, near the D.C. zoo. This is right after we got in trouble (me included) for playing on the escalators.

Sometimes with Clair, though, we can still get a pretty decent pic - if she's in a good mood.

Movie star!

These eyes slay me, seriously.

This picture cracks me up -- of them at Naomi's 4th birthday party (Happy Birthday, Naomi!) --  because it says so much about who they are right now. Dean is like, "Juice boxes and junk food and things I don't get to eat a lot. YAAASSSS!" Cary is all, "What's Dean doing? Dean! Dean! Dean!" and Clair is totally ignoring the instructions that everyone is supposed to wait to eat their pizza until we all cheer for Naomi. Yup. That's them.

I successfully avoided eating the pizza AND the cupcakes at this party. Then later on that night, I succumbed to one of each. Sigh.

We spent Father's Day at my parents' house, where we mostly just hung out and spent time with Dad (and we saw Pop-Pop for a second, too, so yay!) and ate a lot of food and sweets. My sister Tahira and her husband bought a table full of crabs, so we picked a few of those -- and it felt like summertime, finally.

While I was there, I thought a lot about how lucky I am to have an amazing father and a husband who is an amazing father to my children. I know that everyone isn't so fortunate. I thank God for all my blessings -- and I pray my children and children's children will always know the unmatched love of a father.

Dad and me, circa 1980.

You gave me wings and made me fly.
You touched my hand I could touch the sky.
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me.
You said no star was out of reach.
You stood by me and I stood tall;
I had your love I had it all.
I'm grateful for each day you gave me.
Maybe I don't know that much,
But I know this much is true:
I was blessed because I was loved by you...

Thank you, Dad.

As we approach Father's Day, I could go on and on about what a wonderful father I have -- and how good he has been to me, consistently, throughout my life.

It's clear, for example, in the man I chose to be the father of my own children just what kind of example my Dad set. And you read this week about how Dad drove an hour just to bring me a plant on my birthday.

I'm a lucky, lucky Daddy's girl and I hope Dad knows how thankful I am for all that he is and does in my life.

But I don't think I thank my Dad enough for the wonderful things he does for everyone else in his life.

How he spends so much quality time with my 97-year-old Granddad at least four times a week, does all his grocery shopping, takes him to the doctor and to the bank, helps him write out his bills and fills his prescriptions, leaves him food to eat, bathes and shaves him. And most importantly, he just provides company -- watching sports or the news for hours on end (sometimes falling asleep from exhaustion) -- so that Granddad won't feel so alone.

How he remains at my brother Rashad's beck and call -- responding to all his needs -- even late-night calls for directions because Rashad's memory is so bad after his accident. How he (and my Mom) still support my siblings, well into adulthood, even though they should probably have stopped a long time ago.

Instead, Dad gives more and more, mostly because he wants to be sure his grandchildren are OK.  He often stops whatever he's doing to actively love his grandchildren: Making Cary feel good about his glasses, going to Kalonji's parent-teacher conferences, or Grandparents' Day at Russy's school. (And we can't even talk about how much he dotes on Matty.)

Last night, he went to my sister's house to give her youngest son, Kwahli, a haircut, because today was his kindergarten graduation. He brought over his clippers, sat him on the counter, and buzzed away. 

And look how handsome Kwahli was!

Dad (and Mom) also bought his suit and tie and shoes.

His sisters, Aminah and Alahna love him!

And of course, Dad was there today, cheering Kwahli on.

Because that's what my Dad does. He shows up when you need him. He's there for the things that matter.

I'm so glad my kids have this kind of example in their father -- and their grandfather.

Happy Father's Day to both of you amazing men.

We all love you!

Father's Day Weekend: Fun and Family

Reading up about Father's Day on folks' blogs and columns etc., it strikes me that there are two distinct ways to celebrate this day-for-Dads.

One is to have a day -- similar to the one many Moms want to have on Mother's Day -- where it's all about celebrating and accommodating the Parent d'jour. Fathers don't want as much pampering, perhaps, but those who choose this kind of day want plenty of Dad-time - to golf, or fish or laze around and watch NBA finals.

The other way is to spend the time being extra-fatherly, if you will, spending time with the kids, doing things for the kids, being surrounded by family.

No way is better than the other, and actually, there's probably a hybrid of the two that works for some people, as well. But most folks seem to fall into one of those two main camps.

This was Lester's fourth Father's Day and each year he pretends that he wants to have the Father's Day free-for-all. He comes up with all these things he says he's going to do all day long "by.MY.self!" He threatens not to come home until long after the kids go to bed.
I am always just fine with that - it's his day, after all. But I also know him better than he knows himself.

Because every year, we do some version of this:
 

Playground fun.

Cherry picking at Baugher's Farm.

Head off as a family for Sunday brunch.

Watch Clair climb on EVERYTHING and give Mommy a heart attack. She is, hands down, my climbiest, most fearless child.

Pose for family photos.

Go hang out with my Dad at my Mom's house, get clothes soaked by Russy, eat Popsicles and all kinds of other junk and just spend time with family all day.

Like I said, either way of spending Mother's Day or Father's Day is fine by me. Lord knows, there will be plenty of Mommies' days that I plan to spend at the pedicurist.

I just thought I would let the record show that Lester does not know himself as well as he thinks he does.

Maybe on his birthday I'll convince him to go out and have time to himself.

Father's Day Fun!

We had a great Father's Day weekend!

Saturday, we took the kids to the Sailabration, to acknowledge the bicentennial of the War of 1812 and give the boys the synapses for Holy Cow! Those are some tall ships!

Holy Cow! Those are some tall ships. And Holy Cow! There are a ton of people out here!

Cary and Dean, as you can tell, were thrilled by this outing.

I had plans to spend most of Sunday morning with my Dad and Granddad in D.C., fixing them a Father's Day breakfast, so I celebrated Lester on Saturday night. After we put the kids to bed, we chowed down on 2-dozen steamed crabs. I bought them earlier in the day, as a surprise to Lester, and got him some beer and me some wine. So we got to hang out, pick crabs, drink, listen to music and relax together. He loved it so much, we've decided to make it a Father's Day tradition. Soon enough, the boys and Clair will be able to join us! But I think we'll take one more year of enjoying our crabs, and the peace, by ourselves. :-)

I bought Lester some extra-large females for Father's Day. My man does like the "big girls." :-)

 And then Sunday morning, after the boys and I gave Lester his cards and celebrated him some more, I went down to D.C., and my sister Tahira and I cooked a huge breakfast of grits, eggs, biscuits, fried apples, sausage, bacon and salmon cakes for my Dad, Granddad and my Dad's brother. It was the very least I could do for my Dad, who is my favorite guy in the world (aside from Lester), and taught me what it meant to be truly loved, so that I would accept nothing less from the man who would eventually be called "Daddy" by my own daughter. Thanks to this man (below), that cycle will continue. :-)

I love you Dad!
 
After breakfast, I came home and gave Lester the night off, so he could go watch the basketball game with his buddy. But he insisted on taking the boys with him to the grocery store first, even though Clair had refused to nap all morning, and he hadn't had a break. That's just how much he enjoys his kids. Isn't he the best?

He truly enjoyed his Father's Day, and we truly are blessed to have him as the best Father/Husband anyone could ever ask for.

We love you, Lester!

Our love...

...multiplies...

...and keeps getting better!

Happy 2nd Father's Day, Lester!

Today, Cary and Dean gave Lester very special gifts for his second Father's Day.

First, they wrote out their own cards for him. All by themselves! (I translated for them in the upper right-hand corner.) Geniuses, clearly!!! They used markers, because inexplicably I don't have any crayons, and they got more marker on their hands and on the foam mats in the living room than they did on the cards. Note to self: Buy crayons!!

(Careful readers will note that Dean's card is ripped. I contemplated having Dean do his card again, on a fresh, un-ripped sheet, but then I realized that a ripped sheet is SO Dean. So at the very least it's authentic.)

Then, they gave him a very important piece of reading material.

(We will NOT be reading this to them, but we do plan to turn it over to them when they have kids of their own. *Diabolically laughing*)


And finally, they took Dad for a leisurely walk around Lake Montebello. It was very relaxing. Even when Dean kept throwing his sippy cup out of the wagon.


All in all, we enjoyed our day tremendously! Can't wait to see what these boys have planned for next year!