I'm still here! Still swamped, but still here!

Hellllllloooooooo!
Do you still remember me?

I so miss blogging, guys. I can't wait for this week to be over, which *should* mean a little downtime at work, at least during my lunch or something, to reflect on life with my kiddos and husband and the world at large.

But for the last few weeks, my work life has been jam-packed! Even when I get home at night, after the kids go to bed, I have been up till 11:30/midnight working. Total suckage.

So much stuff has happened that I'm sure I'll never remember to get down. I never did get to my post about liking my kids (there was a point I wanted to make) and I haven't even had an opportunity to share post-Halloween photos. Blah.

But I had 5 minutes this morning before a call and I wanted to share this photo of the boys, which we snapped last weekend, when we pulled up in front of our house after a lovely afternoon spent at our friend Stacey's house, turned to look in the backseat and found:

Isn't that the sweetest thing? They were just staring up at the DVD player, holding hands, peaceful, blissful and beautiful. I swear one of the sweetest things about being a parent is getting to witness that kind of love.

So imagine how torn I am today, one day after getting a message from the kids' school that Dean had been in an "incident" on the playground. I won't get into it here; it's silly, if you ask me and completely overblown. But suffice it to say, my peaceful, sweet boy Dean -- the one who runs to Clair if she falls and sings to her -- had quite a day yesterday. He was really upset about it most of the evening, and he needed lots of love and attention. I felt so bad for him.

I totally understand that schools need to be safe places for kids, and that staff needs to correct children when they do things they shouldn't. But I just wonder what we've come to that adults think 3-year-olds are supposed to behave like 10-year-olds -- never get frustrated or angry, never have emotions, never act out.

We teach our boys to be peaceful and kind. And you can tell from that photo that they *get* that.

So, I'm OK. Dean's OK. Everything is ... OK.

Play day

The Gilman School is a fancy-schmancy private school for boys here in Baltimore.

We'll likely never be able to afford to send even 1/4 of a kid there. But that's OK, because their awesome, awesome playground is open to the public.

At least we think it is. Hmmm ... Errr ... It was open for us yesterday. How 'bout that?

The word of the day: Perspective

Yesterday, Lester took Dean to the doctor to see about the complaint he was having about his ear. We were especially vigilant because Michelle told us that Dean had a little waxy substance coming out of his ear when he woke up from his nap the day before.

This happened with Cary over the holiday break, if you recall, and it turned out -- after a few days of us thinking it was only ear wax -- he had a burst eardrum! So we weren't taking any chances with Dean.

Guess what? Dean has an ear infection. And of course he would! This is the Davis House of the Infirm is it not?

That makes us 3 for 3 for kids with ear infections this winter. And it also brings the total number of people on antibiotics in our house to 3 (Dean, Clair, me). If you count Michelle, who has also been taking antibiotics to help with her month-long sickness, that's 4 people!

And we're now on week 4 of me being sick -- although I have to say, I am feeling better finally, thank the good Lord in heaven (and also thanks to the wonders of modern medicine. And time, too, I suppose.)

Anyway, I got a good dose of perspective this week from Laura C. so I have resolved not to complain about the relatively minor things that are affecting our family's health.

Instead, I will take time to reflect on how amazingly amazing my children are. Because they are here for such a very short time, in the scheme of things, and tomorrow is never promised.

Even though I felt like shiznit, I took the boys to the playground on Sunday, because it was such a nice day. We ate snacks and played for close to two hours. They loved it!

 

Here they are playing "train." Dean is the "tunductor." At one point, Cary looked at the letters on the side of this toy and said, "B. Eight. O. Spells 'train.'" I told him he was absolutely correct.

At some point on Sunday night, while I was fixing dinner and Lester was "watching" the kids in the basement, and also the football game, Dean brought me my cell phone, which had been disabled. Why was it disabled? Because Dean had been playing with it -- a No-No! -- and iPhone shut him down!

Later on, I looked through my photos and found that my Dean is an incredible artist. Check out these two selfies he took -- somehow using my Hipstamatic program.

The perspective on those selfies just grabs me. Who is that little boy? What is he thinking? What does he want out of life? Where will he end up in the future?

Anyway, he also somehow got into a drawing app I have on my phone for kids, created an abstract - and then took a screen shot of it.

What does it mean, Dean? What does it MEAN?!

I honestly have no idea how he was able to do all this. But one day, when my child's artwork and photography is hanging up at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, don't say I didn't tell you.

And, just for good measure, here's a picture of  my darling Clair -- without her hair standing up all over her head.  For a kid with an ear infection and RSV, she is really super pleasant. And cute, too.

Hello lovely!

And, since I am in supreme children-appreciation mode, and want to savor all my wonderful memories with them, here is a video of the boys when we were watching the Inaugural parade on Monday, and they got inspired by the marching bands to dance along. I hadn't intended to post this, because the playroom looks such a mess. (Isn't that silly?) I mean, who the hell cares? Having kids is messy sometimes, and in our house, more often than not. So here they are, the marching, dancing Barack Obama-loving Davis boys:

I was feeling like total crap by the end of the day Monday, and I was also feeling just a wee bit jealous of all the people who got to go to the Inauguration and feel -- in person -- the simultaneous solemnity and excitement of the day.

But in retrospect, I am so glad I got to spend a few minutes in the messy basement playroom, with my children, enjoying them as they jumped and danced and marched and laughed. These are the moments that give meaning to my life.

Perspective = Realizing I wouldn't trade this time with them for anything in the world.

Another full weekend!

As the weather gets warmer, and my maternity leave days dwindle, I seem to be cramming more and more into the weekends. This weekend was no different.

Friday morning, I met up with my friend Jen and her two sweeties Molly and Keegan (Keegan's just a few weeks younger than Clair) and had a playground playdate. The boys and Clair had a ball!

Friday night, Lester and I had Date Night!! (Thanks to Michelle, who donated her babysitting time just because she is super sweet like that. We really LOVE Michelle.)

Lester gave me flowers when he got home from work (awww!), and then we went to a Turkish restaurant for dinner, where the food was amazing. We ate and drank and talked and, because we had a window seat, we people-watched and talked some more. It was really lovely.

 As good as the Turkish are with delicious meats and rice dishes, they are not so hot in the dessert department. So when we left there, we went to Morton's for their LEGENDARY HOT CHOCOLATE CAKE!!!! I honestly could not, in a million years, tell you how much I love Morton's LEGENDARY HOT CHOCOLATE CAKE! I love it so much that I have to say it in ALL CAPS every single time I say it, or else you will not properly understand how much I love, love, love Morton's LEGENDARY HOT CHOCOLATE CAKE!

It takes 30 minutes to make it, so while we waited, I ordered colossal shrimp cocktail and Lester had a Glenfidditch 12 year, neat. Then we both devoured the LEGENDARY HOT CHOCOLATE CAKE!!! and nearly collapsed from being so stuffed and happy and also a little bit drunk.

When we got home, all the children were asleep, and they stayed that way until ...wait for it.... 8 o'clock the next morning!!! Seriously, I think I can still hear angels singing from that marvelous occurrence.

We hustled and got ready so we could meet our friends Mark and Kelly (and their little girl Naomi) at the Touch-a-Truck festival in their neighborhood. We imagined our boys would lose their minds over all the trucks, buses, cars, etc. they'd be able to see, touch and climb in. And lose their minds they did, but not in the way we saw it in our heads.

Cary loved riding on the little train they had set up.

Someday I'll tell you how my child got out in public and acted as if he had no idea what "wait your turn" means. #Iswearmychildhashometraining

  And Dean loved honking the horn in the school bus.

What? This IS my happy face.

But other than that, Touch-a-Truck was a major FAIL. There were tears upon tears upon tears upon tears galore. "No like it!!!" Cary wailed. "Up! Up!" Dean demanded.

It was really noisy and incredibly loud what with all the sirens blaring and horns honking, and the trucks and buses must've seemed frighteningly bigger to them up close. No amount of balloon-buying, bounce-house-attempting (also a major FAIL) or faux excitement on our part could stop the melting down. At a certain point, both boys had to be held or else they would completely lose it. 

Cary, being held by Kelly, refused to even look at the camera. Dean was fine as long as he was in Lester's arms.

So, we said reluctant good-byes to our friends and boogied out of there. This is one way we know that we have gotten better at parenting. Early on in their lives, we would have 1) felt like we had done something wrong because our children were so unhappy 2) tried over and over to get them to see how much fun Touch-a-Truck day was 3) sniped and stressed because of the heat, the crying, the noise and the fact that we got up early and hustled down the highway to get to Touch-a-Truck and these darn kids don't appreciate it! And we would really like to talk to our friends, dangit! And it's so frikkin' hot!! And you LOVE trucks, boys! We have to read "My Big Truck Book" and "My Truck is Stuck" 8,000 times a day! What is the PROBLEM?!

But nearly 2 years into this thing, we know to just cut our losses, pack up the crying kiddos, laugh at the insanity, kiss our friends, arrange a time to see them without crying kiddos (and with cocktails instead) and keep on with the rest of the day. No problemo.

So that's what we did.

We first went to see my sister at her house so we could give the boys' cousins Aminah and Kwahli their birthday presents. Aminah turned 7 on Friday and Kwahli turned 4 on Saturday. I have pictures from that popsicle-filled visit as well, but my sister Kadija would kill me for posting them, because she hates photos of herself. So I will respect her wishes and not post them.

From there, we went to my Mom's and spent the entire day there. My mother bought the boys a bubble lawnmower that was supposed to be for their birthday, but she couldn't wait to give it to them. I don't have to tell you that they thought this was the BEST. THING. EVER.

What? This IS my happy face!

Clair enjoyed napping with her cousin Matthew, both on the floor and in my arms.

Zebra-print throw = napping New-Jersey-style

 

Mom and Matthew, me and Clair

And because it was Cinco de Mayo, we made soft tacos for the kids and strawberry margaritas for the adults. (Tahira has the best strawberry margarita recipe, with real blended strawberries. Yummmm!) 

All the Davises were exhausted by the end of the night, so we put on an Elmo Sings the Hits DVD in the car on the way home, keeping Cary and Dean singing happily -- and not crying even a little bit, despite the fact that they barely napped all day and it was 2 hours past their bedtime! The no-crying also made Mom and Dad happy, which is why I totally thumb my nose at the "your children will DIE if you let them ever watch television before they turn 2" madness.

At home, we put the kids in a warm, soapy tub to wash off all the popsicles, birthday cake, grass, Touch-a-Truck tears, taco sauce, bubble mixture and strawberries, got all three crankies in the bed, had another Cinco de Mayo toast and conked out ourselves. Clair slept until 6:30 a.m. (in her own crib!) drank a bottle and went back to sleep until 10. Her brothers didn't make a peep until 9:30 a.m.

Sunday morning, I made French toast, put the kids down for a nap, met two friends for lunch, came home, played with the boys, cooked dinner, drove BACK to my Mom's because we accidentally left Lester's car keys there, listened to two awesome "This American Life" episodes all the way through without interruption on the way up and back (that app is the best thing ever), got home in time to crawl into bed and watch Mad Men with Lester, while all three children slept (in their own cribs!) until the morning.

(NOTE: Notice how I am purposely NOT saying the words "sl*** thr*** the n****" where Clair is concerned, because I know that as soon as I do, it'll never happen again.)

Now it's Monday again and I only have TWO WEEKS left of maternity leave (pardon me while I go cry my eyes out). And I can't decide if I should rest up from the weekend or cram some more stuff in! Like organizing my bathroom closet? Also, the boys turn 2 on Friday and I still have no plan for their big day, so I really need to get crackin' on that.

Hmmm.

I think I'll take nap and organize and plan later. :-)

P.S. SERIOUSLY, WHERE IS AUNT FLO???

Catching up in between feeding and napping

This blogging while parenting a new baby is proving more difficult than I thought!

It's been so long since my last post, I have so much to say, and of course Clair just woke up from a nap and is only being stalled temporarily from screaming by a glorious pacifier, so I don't know how much time I'll actually have.

But here goes.

Since last we met, a bunch has happened:

1. My Dad had his 60th birthday, and I took Clair down to D.C. to meet him for lunch to celebrate. It turned into a full day, as we picked up my middle sister, Kadija, from work so she could come too, and then the two of us went to visit our baby sister, Tahira, who had come home the day before from the hospital with her new baby, Matthew.

Check out Clair and Matthew together for the first time. She is SO much bigger than he, and only a month and a day older. But I suspect this won't last long, as Matthew's Dad is pretty big guy.



2. Our family noted that it has been a year (as of yesterday) since my brother Rashad's near-fatal car accident. This is cause for much rejoicing, and we're planning a big Easter-dinner celebration to really mark the occasion.

Here's Clair and her Uncle Rashad. This picture totally brings tears to my eyes, as there were many moments a year ago when we had no idea if he'd live or die. And here he is holding my unexpected baby daughter! So many miracles in this one photo, I can't even DEAL!
(Rashad calls her Lil' C. Why? I have no idea. But he has nicknames for everyone, so this is par for the course with him. I think it's cute...)



And here's Clair with her Uncle Haleem, my other brother. We don't get to see too much of him, because he is always off doing single-guy-with-no-kids things, so we will cherish this photo as evidence that he and she did, in fact, meet! And he fell in love instantly. (Of course.)



3. I got a little over-zealous with my newfound non-pregnant energy and decided to buy a bunch of organizational things at Target to try to make my house NOT look like a tornado hit it, and all the carrying heavy things and working has me feeling oh-so-sore. I had been feeling much better, but now I am having trouble sitting up in the bed again. So today, I am taking it easy, despite the fact that it is BEAUTIFUL outside (77 and sunny), and I really want to be outdoors with my boys. But come next week, back to getting my house in order!!!

4. Speaking of the boys, they are just getting so big and awesome! They are starting to tell "stories" about things that happened or things they'd like to happen. The stories have few, if any, verbs, mind you, mainly nouns, but you can certainly piece the tale together. One such exchange might go like this:

"Big Truck Book. Broke it. Dean. Mimi take it. Time out!"
or
"Outside, puh-leeeez. Park. Children. Later. After nap. Puh-leeeez."
or
"Bathtub. Upstairs. Mommy comin' too. MOMMY!! Comin!!"

It's so great to hear them start stringing so many thoughts together. We can actually have conversations! Last night at dinner, Cary told me he wanted a "new bib," because the one from lunch had "rice on it." (Hello, Mr. Neat-n-tidy!) So I got out two new bibs, one yellow and one blue. I handed Cary the yellow one and was about to hand Dean the blue one, when Cary said, "No! Blue one! Blue bib. No yellow one!"

This is the first time he's shown a preference for one item of clothing over another one. I was shocked. Who knew he cared which color bib he wore?

This, my friends, is so much better than screaming incessantly without words. I simply handed him the blue bib instead of the yellow one, and all was quiet at the table. Oh, the wonders of communication!! I know parents of older kids lament the nonstop talkativeness that comes with age, but I can't wait! (Will this come back to bite me? I'm pretty sure it will.)

Here's a cute video of Dean, attempting to sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and you can actually hear a little bit of an actual tune!



5. I am failing miserably at the "get-Clair-on-an-eating-and-sleeping-schedule" attempt. Not only does she eat and sleep when she darn well feels like it, she also still sleeps in our bed! ACK!
Do you know how opposed to this I am? And how powerless I am to stop it?
The problem is that she will sleep in her crib, but only after she is REALLY REALLY asleep. That means I have to hold her for 20-30 minutes to make sure she's knocked out before putting her down. During the day, I can do it. But at night, while lying in my bed, eyes weighted down, back hurting etc., it's really hard to hold her that long without falling asleep myself. And when that happens -- usually long before 20-30 minutes has passed-- I just lie her down in the between us and try to steal a few winks, too.
And then, when she does go down in her crib, even during the day, she never sleeps as long. She tosses and turns and frets, or sometimes wakes fully and cries to be held. Again, during the day this is bearable, but at night, I am so darn sleepy that I just want her to sleeeeeeeep (please dear Lord, let her sleeeeeep) so I allow her to snooze in between Lester and me at night. And for about a week now, that has meant at least one 4-hour stretch of sleep per night, usually between 2 and 6 or 3 and 7. Do you know how good those four hours feel? Let's just say I'm happily sacrificing my ...er..."romantic" life, ahem, by having her in the bed with us, just so I can keep those lovely four hours of sleep. That should give you an idea.

6. The boys and I (and Michelle and Clair) have been doing good with the getting out and about, enjoying this early Spring. And I am so struck by how much more like boys my boys are, and how much less like babies. At the playground, they actually interact with other children. They run from play area to play area, climbing and exploring and sliding. They fall, get up, brush their hands on their shorts and keep playing. Their knees are dirty -- or skinned -- when we get home. They have that outdoor smell at the dinner table. I can't get over it.

7. Lester and I are doing much better, now that both of us are getting a smidge more sleep (those four hours, I'm telling you!) and also now that we have determined that we HAVE to take even just a few minutes at the end of the day to stop, touch, and be together, without phones or Facebook or newspapers or anything in between us (although sometimes Clair is with us, but that can't be helped). This is working wonders, folks, and I urge you all to try it. Take 15 minutes and just lie on the bed together (not in a ...er... "romantic" way, necessarily -- unless you both want to, in which case, hells, yes!!) and hold each other and chat, or doze or watch HGTV or the Real Housewives of Atlanta and just BE together. Hold hands, or intertwine legs, or just lie cheek-to-cheek. It really makes a difference. We honestly don't get to do this every day, with all that we have going on, but just the few times a week we've done it has lifted the tension and re-introduced intimacy and made things so much lighter and sweeter. I highly recommend it.

OK, Clair woke up, drank her bottle, I had lunch and washed her up, and now she's asleep again, so that's my cue for a NAP.

I promise to get to reading all my friends' blogs soon. I miss you guys!

The Day the Earth Shook and the Boys Were Calm

Yesterday, a 5.9 magnitude earthquake hit Virginia, and rocked buildings and homes all up and down the East Coast.

There wasn't much damage (thank God!) but City Hall shut down to inspect the foundation, so Lester got sent home early. I left about a half-hour early, too, and when I got home, my house was empty. Using my training from years of reading Encyclopedia Brown books and watching Matlock and Murder She Wrote, I determined that Lester's car was parked outside, but the little red wagon was missing.

"A-HA!" I thought. "They've gone for a walk!"

So I got in the car and found them headed toward the park.

Encyclopedia, Ben and Jessica would be so proud of me!

Here we are, Mommy!!! :-)

We had a really good time at the park, although I think my boys are still just a tad young for all the equipment. They mostly liked sitting just outside the park on a blanket with us, under a huge shade tree, gathering sticks and rocks and trying to keep their balance walking on uneven surfaces. (Getting a little better!!)

They loved watching all the other children play, and the people walking their dogs in the neighborhood. Cary went crazy watching two boys riding their bikes up and down in front of the park. He kept saying "buk! buk!" and waving his hands in the air excitedly.

Then they discovered a little girl's bike near us on the grass. And it was all over.

This is where they stayed for like 15 minutes, happily exploring every single inch of this bike. Cary even tried to eat the pedals (ewwww!) -- that's how much they love bikes.

When the little girl (who was very sweet) came to retrieve her bike, it was time to go home.

Thankfully, the rest of the night was fairly uneventful. The boys ate next to nothing for dinner (oh well), sailed through their baths, got their meds before we said Good Night prayers, and conked out without a peep.

If that's the chain reaction we get from going to the playground before dinner, I say we go every night!

A swinging good time

Yesterday was so beautiful (80-degrees!), we decided to take the babies to a neighborhood park after work. Unfortunately, this park only has one baby swing, so we had to take turns. The babies actually didn't notice, but it meant I only have solo pictures of happy, swinging babies.

Dean leaned back in the swing, like it was a Lazy-Boy recliner:

Cary liked to lean forward. Go figure.


And just for good measure, a little video!


(For some reason, Cary seems to enjoy watching Dean swing more than Dean likes to swing. You can hear him laughing off to the side. Actually, Cary is constantly cracking up at Dean for no reason.)



(Why does my child still have a faux-hawk?)


Can't wait for more warm days and more outings with the boys!