Friday, August 24, 2012

Pre-school Open House reflections

We had Open House at the kids' school last night. 
Here we are modeling "sitting quietly" and "listening to the teacher."
Here the boys are completely ignoring my modeling.
I have to be honest and say it wasn't what I hoped.

The boys had serious over-the-top anxiety before we got there, and cried and panicked and refused dinner and just acted really manic, which was unexpected and totally threw me into a state, which totally made Lester short with me, which totally made the whole first part of the night sucky.

Once we got there, the school was running a little behind, so we had to stand outside. It was hot and sticky, and I was in no mood. Then, people started arriving with their kids, and everyone was all smiles. The Open House was for the whole school, so we met mostly older kids, but they were all so cute, it took my mind off of being anxious. And the boys perked up, too, once they were surrounded by little people.  So I was sure things were on the upswing.

But once inside, I was struck by how disorganized things seemed. It was really noisy and hot and chaotic, and completely unscripted. I imagined we'd all come in and hand over our paperwork and supplies, and the teachers would say "Hi Cary! Hi Dean! I'm Miss Toni! I'm Miss Christina! Welcome to your classroom! Here's your cubby! Here's the play area! Mr. and Mrs. Davis, let me show you where we will store their lunches and wash their hands and blah, blah, blah."

Then I thought there'd be a cheerful, chirpy little speech to the whole classroom full of nervous, new parents, complete with a jaunty little list of the kiddies enrolled. Something along the lines of, "In this year's class, we have Jordan A. Jordan, where are you? (Jordan's mom and dad wave.) We also have Mia! Mia, say hi to everyone! (Mia looks shy and her parents smile and wave). We're lucky this year to have TWO sets of twins in our class: Miles and Isla, and Cary and Dean! Where are our twin twins?? (Everyone laughs. We all wave)...etc. etc."

Instead, we all mostly milled about, bumping into one another and introducing ourselves. Then the teachers stood in the front of the room and mainly told us a bunch of "don'ts."

Don't send this kind of Pull-up. Don't send them in nice clothes; they will get dirty. Don't think our class isn't clean because your kids get sick a lot this year; they WILL get sick. And then they will get sick again. Your kids are going to cry - maybe for months. Don't linger too long while they cling to your leg; this is not helpful. Don't stand in the doorway, peeking through the window. Don't send food you know your kids won't eat; we won't force them to eat it. Don't send party invitations unless you invite the whole class. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't.

I asked for a list of the names of kids in the class so that I could start talking about all their new friends over the weekend, and one of the teachers said she didn't have it yet. Really? You don't have a list of the kids in the class -- which starts Monday??

And it was then I noticed that her classroom wasn't even put together yet. Bulletin boards were half empty; boxes needed unpacking. She KNEW we were coming. Why wasn't that done yet? Has no one ever told her about "first impressions?"

See? Look at the board behind me. Where's all the stuff???
The disorganization, frankly, made me nervous.

The boys are only going to be there for three hours a day. With 12 kids in the class, all needing diapers changed at various times, noses wiped, help with snacks, continuous corralling, occasional disciplining, etc., I have no idea when all the good stuff is supposed to happen, if these people don't have the schedule down like trains running. When will they have organized circle time? When will they sing songs? When will they get hugs? When will they learn anything?

Oh! And then on our way out, the teacher told me that my bins -- the ones I decorated for the boys with love and clip art (lol!) -- they're both too big. Cary and Dean have to share a cubby (which kinda bothers me) and when both bins are stacked in the cubby, they won't be able to fit their coats, too, she said. So she asked me to either put all their things in one bin, or buy two smaller bins. Of course, I am opting for the two smaller bins. Cary and Dean are two separate people. Individuals. It's bad enough that some of the other kids get their own cubbies and my boys have to share. They can at least have their own bin. Dammit.

Since everything was running so ridiculously behind, we couldn't stay for the ice cream social, because it got to be 8 p.m., already past the kids' bedtimes, and they hadn't even started scooping.
So we even missed that. Sigh.

What a night. Honestly, in the scheme of things, it was probably just fine and some chaos with a crowd of 2-year-olds is probably to be expected. Lester thought it was just fine. So did Michelle, who came with us. Maybe I just had too high expectations?

Anyway, for what it's worth, the boys very much enjoyed playing in the classroom with all the new toys, and meeting their new classmates.
They played together.
They played with new friends!

Look, Mommy! Starbuilders!!
And Miss Christina already told me that she can tell she's going to fall in love with Dean (he was being such a sweetie!) [When I told him to ask the teacher if he could play with a certain toy he wanted that was up too high for him to reach, he went over to her and said, "TEACHER! I want the toy. Pleeease." And when she gave it to him, he said, "Thanks!" It was cute. ]

And, most importantly, in the car on the way home, both boys said, "I like school!"

I hope I will too.
Bonus pic of Clair and Lester, just because it's cute.

4 comments:

Candice Baptiste said...

Ok let me start with saying this comment may not be helpful. You are a little bothered, Lester and Michelle are fine, but I am pissed! I am pissed that you are paying good money to what appeared to be a good school i.e. waiting list and your first “real” introduction was this thrown together mess. For a place that is supposed to focus 100% on children it seems that little pre-planning and forethought has gone into what the children need. i.e. the “social” to START on time and END before bedtime. And most people have their toddlers In. Bed. BEFORE. 8!!! Did I say I’m pissed?

To be honest as I read this blog the things I just mention bothered me. I got pissed when I read Cary and Dean have to share a cubby. Why? Aren’t they going to have to deal with people treating them like a unit they don’t need to get this from the institution as well! Did I say I’m pissed? Cause I am!

I told you this comment wasn’t going to be helpful. I know I’ve probably riled you up and to make things worse now that I’ve typed this I think I’m even more pissed than when I read your blog. Sigh…

In an effort to find the bright side: 1. The boys love it and will be fine. 2. It will only be for 3 hours. 3. In their list of "don'ts" they gave some good advice. 4. You can use the bins at home and now you have practice and a plan for the new bins. 5. If it turns into a total disaster you can always pull them out because you still have Michelle.

LauraC said...

Okay my comment is the exact opposite of Candice's!

First, this sounds about right for every meet the teacher night we have ever gone to. At least they had a whole list of rules so that you were mentally prepared.

Also... at first it appears to suck that they share a cubby. N&A shared one their whole day care career. GET ONE. GET ONE BIG ONE. Because then they can share everything, instead of having to send one of each for each kid.

Let me just say... especially during the potty training phase.... we were LUCKY they shared a bin of clothes bc one or the other would go through ALL of the pants and ALL of the socks and even the extra shoes during a day of accidents.

And just to make you feel a little better, our public school is yet again one of the top elementary schools in NC and meet the teacher night is about as chaotic as you describe.

DCAngel said...

Um, yeah, I'm with Candice on this. The part where they had to share a cubby elicited a WTF from me. Seriously. They are two people!! Grrr. And they hadn't started ice cream by 8?? Again, WTF? This thing should've started and ended earlier. And to keep you waiting outside of the building?! I'm annoyed for you. I'm sure it will get better, but man, that was a crappy way to start.

Anonymous said...

I agree, it stinks that they have to share a cubby (and that their bins won't both fit in...). Despite the practical aspects, despite knowing that I, as a teacher in a class with one too few cubbies, would probably handle it the same way, I bristled a bit when our kids were lumped together like that. Happily, they didn't mind, and I bet your two won't either.

Here's hoping Dean and Cary take to the real thing as smoothly as they seem to have taken the Open House.