No earrings for Clair!

So, I decided to seek expert advice about whether or not we should pierce Clair's ears.
For those of you who don't speak Social Network, that means, "I posted it on Facebook." :-)

I have NEVER, EVER gotten so many responses to anything I've ever posted! People have real opinions about this, and memories and emotions, too. It was truly fascinating to read them all.

The responses, of course, only served to make me more confused. There were good arguments on both sides of the issue. Do it early and she'll not remember the pain or tug on them -- and she'll be totally cute, to boot! Or wait till later, when she can remember the fun memory of getting them (and maybe I can be a part of that!) I'm posting some of the responses here, so you can see just why my head was spinning when it was all over. (See below.)

But, at the end of the day, Lester weighed in with his opinion, and there was no equivocation. He really doesn't want to get her ears pierced as a baby (despite the fact that it's a tradition in my family). He said he'd rather her wait until she's older and can decide on her own if she wants them. And then we can make it something she earns, perhaps. I guess if I'm being honest, I'm a little bit disappointed. My Nana (my Mom's Mom) pierced all our ears when we were babies -- her girls and her girls' girls and even some of her great-grands (the category Clair falls in). I had earrings since 9 months old -- little gold balls. And they look totally cute in pictures. I imagined Clair with little studs and I almost always cracked a little smile (even though I also cringed at the idea of her being in pain, or getting an infection, or swallowing one of her earrings - YIKES!)

But at the end of the day, this is not my family; it's OUR family -- entirely its own thing, not bound by the traditions of the family my Mom created. So I want to respect Lester's feelings on this. And I'm OK with it.

After all, this little chunky monkey doesn't need any help in the cuteness department!

Lounging at the beach in her hot pink bathing suit. All she needs is a drink with an umbrella in it!

Here's some of the Facebook discussion, in case you want to participate in the volley. Read it and let your head spin, too:

·

• 
  

  Jenn Zahirsky We did my niece when she was too young to remember.... personally since I rememeber the day I got mine done, I think we made the right choice for her.
  

  21 June at 09:25 ·
• 
  

  Lisa Smith-Simpson I say the younger the better for the baby and your nerves. Some tylenol and a bottle and she will go right to sleep.
  

  21 June at 09:26 ·
• 
  

  Lynn Anderson Davy I think earrings on baby girls are really cute but I didn't do it for Alice. I was 16 when I got my ears pierced. My niece got hers pierced when she turned 5 and she didn't even cry.
  

  21 June at 09:49 ·
• 
  

  Linda Perlstein Doesn't really look cute to me (though of course Clair will look cute regardless). Also, I take my earrings out at night—they're not comfortable. Why make a baby have those in?
  

  21 June at 09:56 ·
• 
  

  Jill Hudson Neal I think they're so cute. If you're worried about the pain, can't the person doing the piercing apply a topical ointment so baby girl doesn't feel anything?
  

  21 June at 09:57 ·
• 
  

  Leeann Adams I think that perhaps it might be best to let Claire decide when she wants her ears pierced. Why do something that's potentially painful if you don't have to? And then you have to clean them. What if they get infected? I begged to have my ears pierced when I was in third grade. My mom made me wait until sixth grade. I was not happy.
  

  21 June at 09:59 via Mobile · · 2
• 
  

  Joyce Hicks We pierced talia's ears at 2. I think it's fine. But you have to twirl them 2x a day for two weeks. Talia's got infected, stuck and hurt. That may be hard in a baby.
  

  21 June at 10:00 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Fern Jackson Seay Think how old you were when you had yours pierced. You just have to take care of them..
  

  21 June at 10:07 ·
• 
  

  Sy Smith My mom had mine pierced way early. Best desicion ever.
  

  21 June at 10:14 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Tricia Bishop I think it's a rite of passage you would both enjoy when she's older. I started asking when I was 5, and was told to wait until 10. I still remember everything about that trip to the mall on my 10th birthday and how grownup I felt afterward. It's a favorite memory. :)
  

  21 June at 10:14 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Rona Kobell I think it does look cute, but it's just another thing to take care of, and you have your hands full. I agree with the folks who say wait until she asks. That's what I'm doing with Maya, who will be 7 next month and hasn't asked, though a lot of her friends have theirs done. if she really wants to do it, we can do it for her 8th birthday. Gah! My niece is 5 and has hers pierced but i don't know when she did it. I got mine pierced at 6, at the dentist's, who was our neighbor. i do remember feeling really grown up and kind of exotic, wearing my little pearl earrings everywhere. But I never wear earrings anymore cuz I'm on the phone so much.
  

  21 June at 10:25 · · 1
• 
  

  Tania DeLuzuriaga I got mine when I was three... my sister had to wait until 13. It was more special for her, I think. And I know the infections were a pain for my mom to deal with when I was little.
  

  21 June at 10:31 ·
• 
  

  Rasheeda Crayton Childress I don't care either way, though my husband is vehemently opposed. I was actually surprised by how much he was opposed. My mother had my ears pierced when I was 2, so I have no recollection of the piercing, and had the benefits of pierced ears for as long as I can remember. So, as a grownup, I certainly like that there are no painful/dreaded memories of the piercing.
  

  21 June at 10:34 ·
• 
  

  Tanika Davis Ugh. Such good points from everyone! This is tough! I got mine at 9 months old, and never had an infection or any painful memories. My sisters all got theirs at or around the same time, and also, no infections. My Nana (my Mom's mom) pierced all our ears, so it's like a tradition in our family. But I am taking into consideration everything you've all posted here, plus the fact that she could swallow them! (I read that somewhere!!) And then there's the newish societal view of babies with pierced ears. It seems some folks see them as "low-class" these days, which I'm not sure I understand. I tend to think it's really cute, when it's tasteful. But...there's that bias to contend with, too! UGH!! Lester's opposed (because of the pain factor) and I'm not as sure about it now that I have a daughter, as I once was when she was a mere theory. Have I said, "UGH!" yet?!
  

  21 June at 10:40 · · 1
• 
  

  Cita D Trice laci was 6 months when i got her ears pierced. that was best because she never messed with them.
  

  21 June at 10:40 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Holly Beatty I would wait until she can decide. They aren't that painful, so it won't traumatize her when she is older. And I personally worry about choking hazard and infections. She could be sensitive to the metals, which I was. It took 3 different times in my life to get it right. But the biggest thing for me is that babies tug on their ears and when that eating gets lost and you find yourself tearing the bed apart or looking thru poopy diapers for a week you might wish you would have waited. Plus since you already know you want her to have them imagine how cool you will be when she says mom can I get earrings and you say yes lets go!
  

  21 June at 10:45 ·
• 
  

  Whitney Jackson I did Sydnee, Emerson and Donovan's all when they were babies. Never had one single issue. Sleeping with earrings in was never an issue because you just get the simple piercing studs with the safety backs. Most babies don't even realize they are there and cleaning them is so simple. I say go for it and if it turns out she doesn't like wearing them when she gets older she can simply take them out. Sydnee wears earrings all day everyday but Emerson only wears them on special occasions because her hair is so long and sometimes it gets tangled. Im glad i didn't wait to do it because my kids don't even remember it. I say do it.
  

  21 June at 10:45 via Mobile · · 1
• 
  

  Elizabeth Wiley Me and my ten-foot pole are sitting over here. Good luck!
  

  21 June at 10:53 · · 1
• 
  

  Sharon Pankey We did our little ones at 3 months...easier when they are babies...:-)
  

  21 June at 10:53 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Tanika Davis ‎Elizabeth , you're going to have to think about this TWICE. Come join me in Ambiguity, why don't you? There's plenty of room.
  

  21 June at 10:59 ·
• 
  

  Elizabeth Wiley I've got an answer for me :-). The answer for me is it will not be done until they are of an age where they can logically and rationally request it being done and then it will be something that they have to earn with behavior above and beyond normal expectations.
  

  21 June at 11:00 ·
• 
  

  Erin Texeira We got Sophia's done at 5 months old. She cried for 15 seconds, then went to sleep in her stroller (leaning on the ears). No apparent discomfort. Over the years, only one infection, when we put in cutsie earrings and forgot to clean them. I recommend tiny hoops (find ones that secure very tightly) -- no infections ever because the metal does not touch the ear and there is no surface area under which dirt can get trapped. We rarely remove them and they are effortless. Now, the "low class" question.... Have heard it. Not your problem. As with all decisions about your kids, decide what YOU think and disregard everyone else.
  

  21 June at 11:02 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Erin Albanese We are waiting until Sophie is seven (if she wants them pierced). I got mine done at the same age and it is a fond memory - I even have photos of the event to share with Sophie. That said, I think earrings are adorable on babies!
  

  21 June at 11:51 ·
• 
  

  Carolyn Brewington Edwards Everyone's responses shows me how much times have changed. Can you believe I don't even remember when I got my girls ears pierced?? Kelly - Help!! She's your baby and whatever you & Lester agree upon will be fine. One thing I do remember is I could not afford gold earrings - I don't care how small the were. :)
  

  21 June at 11:52 ·
• 
  

  Raven Ellis Mine were pierced before I left the hospital by the doctor... From
  what i hear some old pediatrician still do it. I had no infections... And my mom said the because I was so young, I did not even pull at them...
  

  21 June at 11:58 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Shreya Hessler Do it. The girls were 8 weeks old when I got them pierced.
  

  21 June at 12:13 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Sylvia Johnson Pryor I have no real preference either way, but I do remember it being an exciting rite of passage when I was in elementary school.
  

  21 June at 12:48 ·
• 
  

  Jill Zarend-Kubatko Hmmm, tough call. I left it up to my daughter and at age 12 she was allowed. I got one with her...
  

  21 June at 12:49 ·
• 
  

  Stephanie Desmon Love babies with earrings. That said, Callie's aren't pierced yet. If I had done them when she was younger, I wouldn't have had to worry about her taking care of them. Now at 5 she wants them but I KNOW she can't take care of them.
  

  21 June at 13:20 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Carla Hubbard I think getting them done when they are less than 1 is best because, as others said, they are less apt to play with them BUT I would stick to plain balls or earlobe hugging hoops so that the don't catch clothing, etc. I put some pretty cross shaped ones on Brie and it almost tore her earlobe so I she didnt wear any for a few years so now, at 4( almost 5) i catch her constantly manipulating them to the point I've threatened to take them out altogeyher
  

  21 June at 13:22 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Laura Hayes-Heuer I don't like them on babies. Plus I like my memories of begging my mom for them and then getting to go with my best friend and getting our ears pierced at the same time. I vote for it to be her decision when she's older :)
  

  21 June at 13:35 via Mobile · · 1
• 
  

  Larry Carson I think the child should decide about things like that when they are old enough.
  

  21 June at 16:24 ·
• 
  

  Shanda Petersen-Collier I had Ajah's pierced as soon as her pediatrician gave the green light. Never had an issue since I kept her ears cleaned. As for discomfort, I gave her some baby motrin an hour before & she was fine. She cried for about 5 minutes then she was fine. I'm so glad I didn't wait for her to get older because she's afraid of urrrything including her own shadow;)
  

  21 June at 17:27 via Mobile · · 1
• 
  

  Sharon Locke Cleaver On her first birthday. Give her a lollipop while it's being done. She won't cry.
  

  21 June at 17:42 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Jon Morgan Tongue piercing much better
  

  21 June at 21:18 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Jo Parker We decided against any cosmetic permanent changes for either kid until we felt they were old enough to give informed consent. Catie got her ears pierced at 10.
  

  21 June at 21:52 ·
• 
  

  Mari Verrecchia DeLonde ‎(My 2 cents) I come from a very old school conservative family who didn't allow me to get my ears pierced until I was 13, and it was then that I discovered that I am HIGHLY allergic to fake jewelry. I say, with a name like Clair Davis, she will always be a classy lady with or without earrings ;) but BECAUSE her name is Clair Davis, she can only wear platinum diamond studs (those are always classy and the other babies will be hatin!) But because I am very politically correct, has anyone asked Cary or Dean their thoughts and if they may want some earrangs? Make it a family affair! :)
  

  21 June at 21:54 ·
• 
  

  Sumathi Reddy I got em as a baby. Most Indians do. Do it!
  

  21 June at 22:53 via Mobile ·
• 
  

  Tanika Davis So, just FYI: My husband says this discussion is non-negotiable. She does not get earrings. Soooo, well...thanks for your time, folks. I really found all your thoughts very helpful! Truly. Not that I had made up my mind or anything. I bounced back and forth all day between wanting to have a memory-making experience with her when she's older and wanting her to have had her earrings all her life, like I did. But the discussion was fascinating!

How Legos Saved My Life

Before our boys were even born, we dreaded the “Terrible Twos.”

How could we not? It seems that’s all we ever heard about, once people found out we were having twins. “Oh, you’re going to have two of ‘em going through the terrible twos!” “Look out! Two times the terrible twos!!” And so on and so on.

So we were more-than-prepared, so we thought, for tantrums, defiance and boundary-pushing. We were prepared for crying and screaming and meltdowns galore.

But we were not prepared for Dean.

Don't let the cute face fool ya: This handsomest child ever gives us a run for our money.

 Dean’s tantrums were epic, long and drawn out, high-pitched and woeful. His screams were ear-piercing; his tears were real. He was never violent or scary. It was just you could tell that once he got going, he had a really, really hard time soothing himself. The meltdown was cannibalistic: The more he cried, the more he felt like crying, and so the more he cried. Does that make sense?

We tried everything recommended: Ignoring it. Talking him through it. Distracting him. Giving him extra love and hugs. Getting down on his level and acknowledging his feelings. Time-outs for over-the-top screaming. More love, more hugs, more ignoring. Sometimes, I’ll admit, we were at our wits’ end, and we yelled. Sometimes I’d put him in his crib until he could calm down. And then I’d fume, or cry, thinking about him all alone in his room unable to sort through whatever it was he was feeling.

I was losing sleep at night about this, wanting so much to meet his needs, and second-guessing everything I did or didn’t do throughout the day. And it was also, quite frankly, making things tough around the house. The screaming and crying would start from the time we got home and go on sometimes until after bedtime. He’d freak out about everything: He wanted something he couldn’t have. He wanted to walk and not be carried. He wanted to be carried and not made to walk. We didn’t get his spoon fast enough. Cary had his toy. Clair was in my lap. It got to be we hardly knew what was going to set him off. And so the days were nerve-wracking and unpleasant for everyone. Even Cary and Clair seemed to be bothered by all the melodrama.

I talked to my doctor about it, who, after asking a zillion questions about intensity, frequency and duration, declared Dean well within the realm of normal. In fact he said Cary was the one who was more abnormal, if you will, for sorta be-bopping through the day, and quickly rebounding from meltdowns with the simple promise of being rewarded by reading. (Not that Cary doesn’t melt down. He does. Believe me. It's just whinier and poutier, not as furious and deep-seeded.)

I also talked to a psychiatrist friend who works with children. Not because I thought Dean was that far-gone. I certainly did not. But for strategies, mostly, and to assure myself that the things we were doing – though not seemingly very helpful – were not at all harmful to my baby boy, who so obviously needed something that we weren’t giving.

(She too assured me, after asking a zillion questions, that he was well within the range of normal.)

Long story short, Dean is doing SO much better these days. Much fewer tantrums, and much shorter times between freaking out and getting over it.

So what did it?

Legos.

Yes, Legos.

I took all the things the pediatrician and my friend said and considered them all. And some of their advice was quite helpful. But I could not shake the feeling that Dean was acting out because of something I was or wasn’t doing. This was more than mere Mommy-guilt. I just knew it.

So I started to think about how our days were spent being dominated by Cary and his desire to “READ!!” All day long. Dean enjoys reading too, but after awhile, I’d notice that he had wandered off somewhere and was, generally, doing something he shouldn’t do. Pulling outlet covers out, or tearing a book, throwing small toys, or pushing Clair’s swing really hard. I’d scold him or put him in time-out, and this would go on several times a day. By the end of the day, I think Dean was tired of being scolded, chastised and sent to time-out. By the end of the day, we’d get the full force of his unhappiness.

So I thought, “We need to find things that Dean likes to do, and do those more often throughout the day.” Immediately, I thought of trying Legos. And I found Starbuilders at a client’s office and thought he’d like those too.  One recent weekend, I went out and bought them both, big tubs of them, and I cleared out the toy box in our living room of miscellaneous junk and baby toys, and left only books, dolls, cars/vehicles, puppets, puzzles, balls and the Legos and Starbuilders. (Their kitchen, instruments, easel and other big toys are in the playroom in the basement.)

The Legos, as I’ve mentioned, were a big hit right away. He loved them. And I swear, now that he has something that he enjoys doing for a big chunk of the day, he gets into far less trouble. He sits and builds long strands of Legos and then takes them apart and does it again. He is so occupied by this activity, he isn’t looking around for naughty things to do. The end result is less scolding, and fewer time-outs. So that when he does have to be disciplined for something, he takes it so much better! Oh, he’ll still scream and cry, but for two minutes not 20.

And I’ve finally found something I can distract him with (besides snacks). Before Legos, I had nothing that he really wanted to do to bribe him with (besides snacks). Now the same way I can say to a melting down Cary, “Hey, can you find Mommy a book to read?!” and he calms down to go get a book, I can say to a melting down Dean, “Can you go get me the box of Legos? I’m going to make a TALL building!” And he bites!

It is awesome!

The net result of the fewer timeouts and diminished discipline is a happier, calmer Dean. And a happier, calmer house.

And that is why I say that Legos saved my life! :-) 

My beetle-bug gets her first barrettes!

Clair turned 4 months old on the 16th. So I figured it was HIGH time she had some barrettes. :-)

Check out the cutest little beetle-bug in the world:

Look closely. They're there, I swear!

Yes, I have some work to do in the hairstyling department. I know this. But even with my sub-standard skills, she looks adorable. Hi, Mamacita!!!

Next up: The Lester vs. Tanika debate about pierced ears. Yikes -- who knew this was such a loaded topic. I'd like to hear your thoughts on the pros and cons of pierced ears on little girls/babies. I won't say who's on which side, so as not to influence your opinions. :-)

Friends with twins, and rolling Clair

I was supposed to be posting all about Dean, but I have two other short things to say, so I'll save the Dean post till tomorrow.

1) Congratulations to my dear friend Angel on the birth of her HUGE twins last night! I won't steal her thunder by revealing their names or any of the details about the birth here. But I will point out that this amazing woman endured so much to get these two babies fat, healthy and here -- and she (almost) never complained! She is an amazing Mom of two already, and she clearly will be totally killer at being the mother of twins! I'm so happy for her and proud of her and I can't wait to get my hands on those two darling babies! (And Zachary too!)

Hope you're ready to embrace the chaos, girl! :-)


2) Clair has started rolling! But only in her sleep. She started on Friday night, by waking me up in the middle of the night complaining. When I went in to pat her on the back, I found that I could not pat her on the back, because she had flipped over, and was lying in the dark, playing with her feet! She did this again last night and then couldn't fall back to sleep right away, I guess because it was just too exciting, all that rolling!
And she turns herself completely around in the crib, and basically does laps all night long. The girl is full of energy, I tell you. And I love it! Even if it means I am pooped this morning!

Speaking of Clair, I finally got video of her blowing raspberries, but Blogger won't let me upload it! Check back later...

Father's Day Fun!

We had a great Father's Day weekend!

Saturday, we took the kids to the Sailabration, to acknowledge the bicentennial of the War of 1812 and give the boys the synapses for Holy Cow! Those are some tall ships!

Holy Cow! Those are some tall ships. And Holy Cow! There are a ton of people out here!

Cary and Dean, as you can tell, were thrilled by this outing.

I had plans to spend most of Sunday morning with my Dad and Granddad in D.C., fixing them a Father's Day breakfast, so I celebrated Lester on Saturday night. After we put the kids to bed, we chowed down on 2-dozen steamed crabs. I bought them earlier in the day, as a surprise to Lester, and got him some beer and me some wine. So we got to hang out, pick crabs, drink, listen to music and relax together. He loved it so much, we've decided to make it a Father's Day tradition. Soon enough, the boys and Clair will be able to join us! But I think we'll take one more year of enjoying our crabs, and the peace, by ourselves. :-)

I bought Lester some extra-large females for Father's Day. My man does like the "big girls." :-)

 And then Sunday morning, after the boys and I gave Lester his cards and celebrated him some more, I went down to D.C., and my sister Tahira and I cooked a huge breakfast of grits, eggs, biscuits, fried apples, sausage, bacon and salmon cakes for my Dad, Granddad and my Dad's brother. It was the very least I could do for my Dad, who is my favorite guy in the world (aside from Lester), and taught me what it meant to be truly loved, so that I would accept nothing less from the man who would eventually be called "Daddy" by my own daughter. Thanks to this man (below), that cycle will continue. :-)

I love you Dad!
 
After breakfast, I came home and gave Lester the night off, so he could go watch the basketball game with his buddy. But he insisted on taking the boys with him to the grocery store first, even though Clair had refused to nap all morning, and he hadn't had a break. That's just how much he enjoys his kids. Isn't he the best?

He truly enjoyed his Father's Day, and we truly are blessed to have him as the best Father/Husband anyone could ever ask for.

We love you, Lester!

Our love...

...multiplies...

...and keeps getting better!

Working, scooting, sleeping, building, playing, raspberry-ing

Sooo, remember how I said that I thought I'd have more time to blog once I was back at work?
Yeah, not so much.

The work hasn't been crazy, so much as just steadily busy, and I've had a lot of out-of-the-office meetings, so I have not had the time I thought I would.

I have a post in my head about our very real challenges with Dean and his temper tantrums, but I don't really have the time to do it justice. So instead, I will tell you that my daughter has learned to blow raspberries and finds doing it repeatedly to be the most fun thing ever. Joy! (Where do kids learn to do this?)

In addition, she is so energetic, that she scoots in her sleep -- in HER SLEEP -- to the end of the crib and bangs her head on the bars, and wakes up and cries for me to move her to a softer space. Every night she does this. At 2 or 2:30 a.m. Every night.

It sounds maddening, but it is really quite cute. She always murmurs and coos a little bit after I've moved her, in her infant way of saying, "Thanks, Mom!" and she always falls right back to sleep. Sadly, I can never fall right back to sleep, but I don't blame her for that. My insomniac ways severely pre-date Clair's arrival.

Also, I might be the last parent on Earth to buy Legos for her kids, and boy am I sorry it took me so long! I bought them for Dean, specifically, because I was looking for something that would speak to his particular way of playing, learning, etc. -- as opposed to being dominated all day long by Cary and what he likes to do (which is reading, incessantly). Turns out the Legos, and these toys called Starbuilders that I also bought, are a big hit with both boys! Dean goes straight to the Legos when he gets up in the morning and all he wants to do is "build something" the majority of the day. He sits on his knees in the living room and just stacks and unstacks those blocks with such determination, and then sometimes he pretends they're weedwhackers or flutes or ice cream cones or canes to walk with.  It's really cute!

Starbuilders are a big hit in my house.

Cary enjoys them, too. But, being Cary, he gets bored easily, and skips around to other things more often, leaving Dean to himself, which is just fine with Dean.

I'm so, so happy I got these for my Deanie, and when I finally get around to blogging about the tantrum thing, I'll explain more why. But in the meantime, just know that sometimes spending the money on toys (even if you have a house FULL of toys) is about more than just playing.

Birthday serenade by the Davis children!

Reason No. 10,576 why I love our babysitter, Michelle.

Because she does stuff like this:

OMG! Best. Birthday present. EVER!

(Love their little slippers! And how Dean stretches out the ends of words like a true R&B singer! And how Cary is so over it. And the newest member of the singing sensations: Clair!)

Like I said earlier, "Happy Birthday to ME!"

Happy Birthday to me!

I'm 39 today!

Because I am an idiot, I decided to come to work.
And on the news this morning they reminded me how old I am by noting that E.T. came out 30 years ago today. Thirty years ago. Thirty. I remember going to see that movie with my Dad, and he cried at the end, but pretended he didn't when we asked him about it. To this day, he swears he didn't cry at E.T. But he totally did. 

I digress. Back to moi!

I may be old and at work, but at least my boys came in the room this morning and both said, "Appy Boithday!" (and then Cary said, "Appy Boithday, Baby Clair!" to his sister, too. Share the love!) Clair was all smiles this morning, and adorably played with her toes while I got ready for work.

And Lester and I went out Saturday night on a surprise birthday date! We had wine and three courses, including a crab and artichoke phyllo thingy that I gobbled in .7 seconds, it was so good. And bouillabaisse! Yum!

And he really surprised me by finding two really hard-to-find CDs I've been looking for, and burning them on to one disc, so I can have them forever! Lester is awesome! I can't say it enough.

Today, I heard from my Mom, her two sisters and my Nana all before I left the house.

I played "Sunday Morning" by Maroon 5 on repeat like six times on my way into work, with the windows rolled down and the volume probably way too high. (That song makes me so happy!)

Speaking of Sunday morning, AUNT FLO came in the wee hours of Sunday morning! So I can quit worrying about that, and start the birth control business. Whew!

My friend Stacey just came in and brought me homemade chocolate-chip cookies! Thanks, Stacey!

And Mother Nature has given me a beautiful day, sunny and warm and bright-bue-skied.


So all in all, it is already a lovely day, and it's only 9:30 a.m.

Happy birthday to me!!

Why I am Divorcing the Today Show

Note: I sent this letter to NBC today. I know they won't care, but it had to be done. Enough is enough.

Sniff. I think I'll miss Al Roker most of all.

Why I am Divorcing the Today Show

Dear Today producers,

I have been a loyal Today Show viewer and defender for more than 20 years. When others decried the "fluff" of morning television, I kept watching, because I understood how your format worked. From 7 a.m. to 8 a.m., we got the news we needed for the day. After 8, there was much more "infotainment," and I actually enjoyed the balance.

Soon, however, the newsy hour began shrinking, until it was decidedly only a newsy half-hour. And still, I watched. Every morning, faithfully.

Even after Matt Lauer, a true journalist, asked a skydiving elderly lady about her "brassiere" and then insultingly asked her if she planned to "take up knitting," I was determined to stick with my favorite morning show, even if the tone and the content was smacking me in the face with its silliness.

Perhaps I had abused woman syndrome. I kept coming back for more.

But I am divorcing the Today Show, and in fact, have already made the switch to CBS, where I find actual news and information for a greater portion of the show than I do celebrity "news," and unending commentary on blonde models (no one's EVER heard of) attacked by plane propellers.

I feel badly for this woman, whoever she is, but there must've been 9,000 segments on her over the course of months and months. I understand the pull of "tragedy-befalls-beautiful-blonde" stories, but seriously?? The Today Show just took their love affair with this story to an epic low.

I made the decision yesterday, when your line-up of segments shockingly placed Miley Cyrus' engagement above news about the Wisconsin recall. I stood in front of the television, half-dressed for work, and fairly yelled, "Are you kidding me?!"

Miley Cyrus?? THIS is more important than the recall and all that story's serious and wide-reaching implications?

Are you kidding me?

I am no hard news junkie, but I really can't take it anymore.

I will try my hand with Charlie Rose and CBS, and if that fails, I suppose I will turn the television off altogether and simply listen to NPR in the house, as well as on the drive in to work.

Please bid my farewells to Matt, Ann, Al, etc. -- and let them know that it's not me. It's them.

Good luck from a former faithful viewer,

Tanika Davis

Button Eyes vs. Saucer Eyes

When I was a little girl, my Nana (my Mom's mom) used to call me "Button Eyes."

Sometimes, she still does. It's really sweet.

When I see Clair, I don't really see that she looks like me, although a lot of people tell me she does.

But I took this picture of her yesterday and all I see are eyes as big as saucers (such a cliche, but it sure fits her), and I bet this is just what Nana was talking about when she looked down at little, infant me.

Although in my opinion, saucers are way bigger than buttons, which is appropriate, because this girl is all eyes.

And I love it!

Nom nom nom nom nom!!! Couldn't you just eat her??

Old Mommy

Last week, I pulled two 14-inch-long gray hairs from my head. This week, there are 6 more.

Yesterday was the 21st anniversary of the day I graduated from high school.

I remember when I was 21 years OLD. How on Earth have I been out of high school 21 years?

Apparently, I am old. Next week, I'll turn 39. Which doesn't feel old so much as it sounds old. Thirty-nine.

{Shudder.}

My mom complained to me the other day that she was annoyed at being totally gray at 58.
But look how good my hot Momma looks totally gray!

I hate her. (Just kidding. She's awesome. I love her!)

But, man, does she have it good?! She's a young 58 with 5 grown-up children who have children of their own. By the time I'm 58, Cary and Dean will be 22 and Clair will be 20. By the time those kids of mine are ready to have kids, I'll be knocking on 70 (God-willing). Good grief. How did this happen?

I usually feel really good about waiting until I was reallllly ready to have children before having them. That means waiting until I found the absolute right partner (took a long time for that, folks) and until I had done a few things I wanted to do as a solo human being, like travel a bit, buy a house, get my finances in order and not care so much about brunch on Sunday mornings or long, afternoon naps.

But when I think about being my Mom's age with college-aged children, I wonder if I would have done better to get started a little earlier.

Then again, my boss, who is 54, has two sons. One's out of college and living in New York; the other's a junior in college. When we come in to work on Monday and do the obligatory, "How was your weekend?" exchange, my part always sounds something like this: "Wah wah such-n-such didn't sleep...wah wah...craziness...wah wah my house is a mess...schlepping screaming kids around...wah wah...never enough time to get it all done."

His part, on the other hand, usually has the words "outdoor concert," "dinner at this great new restaurant," "golf," and "then we decided to stop and get a drink at [you-name-it cute little spot on the water] and stayed there for hours!"

I hate him. (Just kidding. He's awesome. And so's his wife.)

So maybe there's light at the end of the tunnel. By the time my kids are the ages his kids are, I'll only be 4 years older than he is now. That's not so bad. Lester will be even younger (lucky dog). So I can look forward to hanging out in New York with my (fun, responsible, interesting) kids the way my boss does with his, and lazing around on weekends with Lester, bopping about the city with little else to do but have dinner at great new restaurants, go to fun outdoor concerts and then decide to stop and get drinks at you-name-it cute, little spot on the water.

Hmmmm. When  I think about it that way, 39 doesn't seem so old, and 58 is sounding pretty sweet!

Notes on Clair

I was re-reading some of my recent posts and I realized that in all the hubbub, I've barely given a sense as to what my baby daughter is like (aside from saying "adorable" a thousand times. Really. I need to step up my vocabulary game).

So, of course she's only three months old, so there's not all THAT much to say. But she is a person with a big personality (already) so it's not quite right to make her sound like Everybaby. She's so not.

Clair is the definition of a happy baby! (I am so thrilled about this, you have no idea!)

She smiles so wide when she sees me or Lester, her eyes squint up and you can see her tonsils! LOL.
This weekend, for the first time, she started responding in that same way to Cary and Dean, too. She looks at them -- with expectant eyes, bright and darty, her arms flung wide and her mouth agape --and when they finally turn their attention to her, she nearly falls over with excitement. It's hysterical.

She smiles and laughs when tickled, when we're talking to her, when we sing to her, when she's in the bathtub, when the fan catches her eye, when she's looking at the blinds, when she's chewing her hands (a favorite pasttime), when she's getting a diaper changed, when she's drooling on my shoulder -- just all the time!

In fact, I'd say she's downright silly. And I love it.

Having a happy baby is truly wonderful. I prayed for a lot of things when I was pregnant with this unexpected baby; mainly that she'd be quiet, compliant, a good sleeper and happy. So far, I have 1 out of 4 (although she is working on the "good sleeper" part, bless her). And honestly, that one thing is much more satisfying to me than all the others.

She's become, over the last three months, quite a good baby. She cries when she's hungry or tired, like all babies, and she cries when she wants to be held or walked around. But you can also put her down, in her chair or her swing or propped in a corner of the sofa, and she'll stay there for awhile, chewing her hand and looking around contentedly. She sleeps in her crib, happily, and for several hours (I will not say anything about STTN, no sir!) She doesn't love, love, love the car, but she will fall asleep -- which my boys never did. Especially not Cary. And I can hand her to people and she won't cry!

Here she is with my 96-year-old Granddad! (How awesome is this?)

There's almost 100 years between these two people.

She's also very strong! She is already 100-percent holding her head up and can twist her body, when lying flat, into a half roll. She can sit in her Bumbo seat like a big girl; she can push off from the bottom of her bathtub or her bouncy chair and scoot her body way up (she almost tipped herself right out of her bouncy one day by doing that. I nearly died). She can stand on her legs so well, my sister asked, "Is she ready to walk?" (No. But she really can stand well on those pudgy legs!)

Let's see, what else?

She's so much fun to be around, and so snuggly and smiley and loveable. I'm very, very pleased with my sweet, chubby, bubbly Clairzee. I truly can't wait to get to know her all the more. <3

Xoxoxx!